Right now

Dead inside, how are you?

Trying at least

staying here

Trying to feel something

Tired.

Noticing you noticing.

Sorry you have to see it.

Want something more myself, yes.

Wishing I could just 'shrug it all off' too

Wanting to move forward with more energy, too.

Pretty sure 'wishing it were so' isn't how it happens.

Trying at least.

Moving forward at least.

Breathing in and out at least.

By the way, the breathing s*** got harder.

Mostly just standing around with dead eyes

Hoping so much you're just happy without me right now.

Just all by yourself, you know?

Because that's what I need most of you right now.

Until I get back to me. 

A moment I'm not sequenced into a series of comfortability?

70th and Alexander

 That afternoon, she slipped into the wood paneled, two story bar off of 70th and Alexander, full of despair. He was the entertainment, at the center back of the bar and like others days he played,  he drummed his guitar while simultaneously singing . She looked left and right, causally wondering about other band members as their eyes swept over and through each other.  Souring from her most recent lover's quarrel, she barely noticed him, that first time, needing a drink (later thinking, how could she not have seen him!) 

The subtlety of text

Is the only truth we have

I don't rightfully know

I don't rightfully know what this is that I have to let now flow over me

That I have to let flow through me

as so much river water

too cold or hot

to let pass down parched lips

Without distress

in the midst of this pitiful April rain,

without you

(low see en toe what a pitiful poem.)

a book would not do justice to what I want to say to you.

leprechauns

We have a plant in the sink

Vietnam on our mind

Dog'd whining because we both have heart issues

then the dishes need to be done

move the plant

wash the floors

Investigate GDP

go against our poverty ridden mothers

take a sip of the cool aide 

and walk down cloud nine

for a pot of gold at the end of this rainbow

because we BOTH see leprechauns are about now