Dear Gut

Dear gut,

What are your feelings?

Gut: soon,

Me: soon?!

Gut: soon.

Me: Okay we'll play songs that signify changes are about to happen.

~Me

I know it's irrational dear

But let's tuck this side in here

Hide this cord

Button this up

Take this out

Put this aside

Smile

And move on

You forgot something sir

Have you ever met someone

You just wanted to rip your heart out 
And hand it to them
Shout
Here!
It's obviously yours!
So take it with you when either of us goes 
The security cameras have been turned off,
The guard sent home.
Please take your stolen goods
And leave my store with what's rightfully yours.

It was priceless to me, by the way

But useless inside me beating in two.

Move

Move

No 

I'd rather

 Be shushed 

Sleeping inside this whisper of

A useless melody

That will take me to h#$&

In my own arms 

With my ability to withstand this

Clinging to the desire to Continue 

because I "love him"

My head wasn't listening, my heart too broken to process but my soul was all ears.

Him

Your love was like a heavy knife stuck in my heart that could not be pulled out without the help of another. I fear bleeding to death but here I stand. But not because of anything I did.

We do this right

Or we don't do this at all

To the depths of hell you'll take me!

If I continue to see this as okay

The way I feel 

The way I'm acting

The way I'm being

Inside my head matters

As much as what my very hands are up to

And you're closer than ever

to not being inside the four walled confines of this mind

And I'm okay with that!

(I never thought I'd say 'I'm okay with that!' But here I am! Here I am!)

Because it's whats for the best for all involved!
And that

And that

And that 

my friend

Makes whatever pain I have to endure

worth it.